Today I had two tests and I did really bad on one of them. After my tests I went laser tagging with my boyfriend Josh and his friends. I felt really out of place with everyone. I did have fun but I felt cut off from the group. I do not like not being a part of a group. I felt so alone and I wanted to hide somewhere and cry. Josh is so outgoing and I am just quite. I don't know what people want to talk about. They were all talking about past incidents that I was not a part of. They would talk about movies that I have never seen. Why am I so bad at being with people when the thing I fear the most is being alone? I am not the kind of person who can just be the center of attention. I am so upset with myself! why am I so ridiculously retarded? What talents do I have? Am I worth anything? Josh deserved better. He deserves one of those hot chicks from his ward who are fun and exciting. Better than me.